Kids Need Time to be Kids - Part 3
November 5, 2003 |
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Transcript
There have been times when my family goes on a vacation that I’ve worn my four boys out. You see, I love to accomplish and achieve the ultimate list. I’ll get up early, research the available activities, plan the day, and after I scare my four boys away, my wife will find me and remind me that "We’re on vacation! It’s time to chill." Co-founder of Parenting Press and Northwest College educator Elizabeth Crary recently discovered that today’s kids are being thrust into an adult like rat-race way to early. She said she’s heard this protest from far too many kids. What one young person said to her recently sums up the problem. Crary said the little girl asked if there was any way she could just hang out with her mom? The rat-race has gotten so bad that three top Harvard officials wrote in the New York Times last December that kids need to slow down. They urged children and teens to discover their true passions and maybe even put off college for a year. Sports, dance, music and other recreational activities used to provide a welcome break and a time to relax - but not anymore!
Seattle cartoonist David Horsey recently published a cartoon of a mother going through a checklist, while a youngster is buried in schools books. The mom is on the phone and she says, "I’m sorry Billy, Johnny’s got four hours of homework tomorrow, soccer, swimming lessons, math tutor, tai-bo on Tuesday, Science camp this weekend, youth group, piano... Ahhhhh... he can squeeze you in for a half hour, two weeks from Sunday."
After studying today’s kids and how over-scheduled they can be, Dr. Alvin Rosenfeld, the former head of the Child Psychiatry Training program at Stanford, wrote about this dilemma facing some of today’s children. From year-round select teams to kids being pushed in summer school to excel academically, Rosenfeld says "everybody is so nervous about getting it right that they’re trying too hard." He wishes parents would shift gears, relax, and enjoy their kids. After conducting his research, which included one-on-one interviews with kids, he reported that kids want one thing: time... to do nothing!
Although Rosenfeld empathizes with parents who are trying to give their children the best start in life, he worries that kids are being seriously hurt. At the extreme he tells about a couple that paid their nanny five hundred dollars for each developmental milestone their toddler hit ahead of schedule. Isn’t it sad that a couple would rather their toddler set records than be with him when he takes his first step? The trend is also showing up in year-round select sports, expensive SAT prep courses, and even toddler gymnastics. In last year's Little League World Series, I was surprised to find out that out of the six top teams, the Bainbridge Island, Washington team was the only "summer" baseball team. All the others played together year-round like professionals. Maybe some of us need to give our kids a break from intense performance and over-scheduling so they can have a little time of their own. Childhood will pass quickly and our kids will be adults soon enough. So shouldn’t we, as parents, prevent the pressure and pace of the adult world from squeezing the childhood right out of our kids' lives? It’s our job to guard our kids' schedules and ensure that they have time to be a kid. |
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